Sunday, March 9, 2008

WTF Happened?

Apparently Cara linked to my blog? I just looked at hers and I didn't see anything. I know she's extremely pregnant and hormonal, but I don't think she's mean or hurtful, just taking my ramblings WAY too personally. Nothing I have been writing here is about her! Wow....where are all you coming from?

I only wrote in her comments "What a beautiful baby belly! I was never round, just stuck out and then flat. Why will you know the date and it'll be before 39 weeks? What's wrong with going into labour when your baby/body wants to? It's usually a much easier labour :)" I HAD MISSED HALF OF HER POST ABOUT NEEDING A C-SECTION due to computer malfunction. I APOLOGIZED in an email to her. Then she wrote about strangers offering advice just because of a pregnant belly, and I thought that was funny, and well put!

I'm not trying to start a birthing war. I'm not trying to educate anyone (right now). I WAS JUST REFLECTING ON HOW I NEVER HEARD HORROR STORIES.

Yes, blogs are public. But would you start butting in on someone's private conversation in line at the bank? Just because you can hear/see a conversation does not mean you need to put in your two cents. But there's nothing wrong with discussing it later with others! Reminds me of the week I spent every evening in the ER and came home and told my husband all the gory things I heard through the curtains. But I was not about to open the curtain and tell the guy with the boil on his butt (true story) that he should have stayed in Florida instead returning here and costing our health system money considering he'd had the boil for three months before moving back to Ontario. I love having people read my blogs (especially the knitting one; this is NOT the knitting blog), but it is a little bizarre to me that strangers are coming here to insult me over a misunderstanding by SOMEONE else. Good grief, I think some people need to get back to knitting.

On the other hand, I would love to hear more about how a personal filter changes how you view something. Do you have anything to share? As for believing in "The Secret"....I believed that what you focus on, expands; for YEARS before I had ever heard of "The Secret". I just knew that if you focus on good things, you will see good things more easily. If your personal filter is negative (like my husband's usually is), you will have a very hard time seeing good things that aren't so obvious. What's wrong with that? THink of the "Serendity Prayer". I'm not religious at all, but there's a lot to be said for it. I choose to view life through a positive lens. That's not to say nothing negative has ever happened to me....assults, miscarrages, near-divorce, no career, lost friends, traumatic birth....but I don't view them as horror stories. And I don't want anyone to tell me that they are!

That's all there is. I wish Cara well, I never would want anything 'horrible' to happen. Birth is unpredictable and any mom-to-be needs a positive framework for the event. I understand not wanting to have a million comments about what could go wrong, or did go wrong, but those aren't horror stories. Those are babies.

Now, excuse me, I have to go put my horror to bed :)

Or, sorry, I believe I was wrong, and the words are "Evil" and "Opinions".

Thanks for all the positive comments too. I didn't think I was all that crazy. Although, I don't really care if others think I am, LOL. However, I will NOT be sharing about peeing in my pants, and the therapy thing just didn't work out ;)


Anonymous said...

Yeah, she linked to your blog, then had a change of heart and posted over it. Pregnancy hormones, ugh!

I was mortified for you there for a few min., hence the supportive comments.

K said...

Again -- I am very sorry.

I identify with Cara only because I know what it is like to want something, not get it and then have others tell you what you could do differently to change things.

We all approach pregnancy, birth and motherhood so differently, but it is such an all-encompassing experience it feels like it has to be universal, no?

I am almost compelled to share all of my pregnancy, labor and early infant experiences with any newly pregnant woman. COMPELLED! Mostly, I desperately want others not to suffer from the same mistakes I made -- mistakes, I now believe I could have prevented had I been a stronger advocate for myself.


So I feel for Cara, because I know she has to fend off people like me constantly.

So I reacted hastily to this little blog skirmish, picked a side and unloaded some snarkitude.

I see now, after reading a bit more here, that you are a very thoughtful person.

And, hey, we all love the yarn, no?


Anonymous said...

wow. you're enjoying this aren't you! four posts on a week old issue? Let it go.

then again, maybe everyone likes their ass kissed once in a while. I hate seeing it on blogs, all the syrupy love all the time, but its better than using someone's hurt to get a little popularity and comments.

what would you say if she had 4 posts about you on her blog and people calling you a snot and an asshole?

she linked to you for about an hour and thought better of it and you are really dragging this on.

You sure are focusing a lot on the negatives here for someone so "positive".

Meg McG

Gaile said...

Maybe Meg McG could just "let it go" as well.

I am sorry to see what you've gone through with all this. Bloggers with large "fan bases" tend to attract people who feel the need to defend the object of their affection and you got caught in the crossfire by the look of it.

I saw all this going on yesterday, and thought better of posting but now just want to say it's nice to find another Canadian blogger who also knits.

Have a great week!